Ignoring Lack to Create Abundance | Steve Pavlina

I’ve been enjoying an abundant year because I focus much more attention on abundance, appreciation, and gratitude than I do on lack, scarcity, and poverty. Some people would say that this mindset is the result of abundance; I recognize the mindset/heartset as the cause of it.

When I did the opposite and paid more attention to what was lacking in my life, I experienced a variety of scarcity-based experiences — sinking deeper into debt each year, being kicked out of my apartment due to lack of rent money, not being able to afford what I wanted, feeling stressed whenever my car broke down, always buying the cheapest items and having them break easily, etc. That place of being was compelling enough to capture my attention for a while, but after a number of years there, I got bored with it and decided to try out the abundance mindset to see what that’s like.

I would often read books or listen to audio programs that went on and on about the abundance mindset, but I figured that was easy for them to say because they were already living it. What if you’re not living it? Usually their recommendation was to start wherever you are, and some would insist that abundance is a mindset you can create regardless of your starting position. I didn’t really buy into that notion at the time, but mainly because I was desperate to try something new, I opted to give it an earnest effort for at least a few days to see if it made any difference. It’s not like what I was doing before that was working, so I figured it couldn’t hurt, and it might help lead me into new territory where a solution could be found.

I began by focusing on feeling grateful for what I did have, like being able to enjoy running along the beach or watching a sunset. I turned my attention away from lack as much as possible. I did my best to ignore my debt, my unpaid bills, and my creditors for a while. Obviously that created some consequences, and I further dealt with those consequences by largely ignoring them as well.

This is really a key point that I don’t want you to just overlook. It wasn’t just that I began to focus on abundance thinking. I also did my very best to ignore anything in my life that suggested lack or scarcity. I stopped looking at my bills. I stopped answering the phone since most of the calls were from creditors. I ignored my debt and stopped making credit card payments altogether. That sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But when I paid attention to those things, they would just bring me down and make me start thinking about what wasn’t working.

This shift of attention soon created external shifts in my reality. I became more creative, released a new product, and started making a lot more money. A year later I was debt free, partly from going bankrupt, which was a good thing because it wiped out most of my debt, and then I paid off the rest mostly in one fell swoop with an advance I received for a game I licensed to a publisher.

I continued to expand upon this mindset of abundance over time. I imagined enjoying time abundance too. I imagined being more generous, first with my money, but then I felt even better about being generous with my time and creativity. I donated thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours to non-profits. I wrote articles for free and hosted discussion forums for free. I didn’t do these things to get any particular result. I did them because I just felt motivated to do them. When I held onto that abundance vibe, I didn’t have to push myself to contribute anything. It just flowed out of me without really trying.

I’ve since created a massive body of creative work and gave it away to the public domain, and I continue to add to that collection each month. This month I started doing microloans as well and encouraged others to join our team, which has been making new loans every day.

I never would have done these things if I was focused on lack. The vibe of lack didn’t make me feel particularly generous; it merely made me project generosity as something other people should do more of, or something I should get around to “in the future” (which of course means never).

There is value in having experiences across the spectrum of scarcity to abundance. I’m glad for the experience of scarcity since it helps me understand and appreciate abundance more deeply. For example, I enjoyed my recent trip to Paris that much more because I know what it was like to not be able to afford such a trip and having it seem like an impossibility. Every day I spent in Paris, I felt grateful to be there. I didn’t take anything for granted.
Through personal testing I came to see that overall I prefer the abundance vibe to the scarcity vibe. Abundance is a better fit for who I am.

I neither require nor expect others to make the same choice I did. Lots of people find growth lessons in the scarcity vibe, and I have no doubt they’ll continue to explore it. I’ve tested that vibe and that mindset enough to know that it isn’t such a good fit for me. I’m happier and more fulfilled on the abundance side. But I wouldn’t be so sure of this if I hadn’t had those scarcity experiences first.

Many times when I write about abundance, there are people who will take issue with it. It’s interesting to see how they project a boatload of assumptions onto me and then argue with their own assumptions. Some seem to think that abundance is wrong. Others want me to pay more attention to poverty.

I pay little attention to poverty, scarcity, and lack, not just in myself but in others as well. My focus is on abundance, gratitude, generosity, appreciation, etc. If you believe that what I’m doing is not enough, it’s because you feel what you’re doing isn’t enough. If you’re in resonance with scarcity, then “not enough” is something you’ll see wherever you look.

When you view one side of the spectrum through the lens of the other, your perceptions are greatly distorted. Just as scarcity may look upon abundance as greedy, excessive, selfish, elitist, narcissistic, etc., so can abundance look upon scarcity as lazy, wimpy, foolish, childish, stupid, etc. But these perspectives aren’t helpful to us… again, because they’re distorted.

You can only understand the options available to you when you experience them from the inside. And yes, this does mean that you can’t really understand an option until you’ve experienced it to some degree. From the outside looking in, you can get curious, but you can’t really gain much insight.

You’re free to do as I’ve done and test different mindsets/vibes to learn which set of experiences you prefer. You have laid out before you a whole spectrum of possibilities to explore.

Try to avoid the mistake of judging or condemning someone else’s position on this spectrum. Don’t expect others to change their mindset just because you have issues. If you feel resistance towards what others are experiencing, look to your dissatisfaction with your own vibe. Then remember that you have the power to make the shifts you desire, if you’re willing to embrace those shifts fully and completely instead of resisting them.

I’m quite pleased with my choices thus far, even as I continue to explore new points along the spectrum of possibilities. I’m fully aware that some people object to my choices and would prefer to see me focus more attention on problems like poverty. From the perspective of scarcity, they want me to change what they’re unwilling to. They want me to join them in their feelings of being not enough. From within the lens of scarcity, this may seem like a reasonable request, but from the perspective of abundance, it’s a rather silly thing to do.

The response to such requests is predictable if you understand how both mindsets work. Scarcity criticizes abundance for being not enough. Abundance finds scarcity’s request silly and so enjoys amusement at the entertainment value of it; additionally abundance is appreciative of the reminder of the contrast between scarcity and abundance. Scarcity doesn’t get its request satisfied and hence validates its experience of not enoughness; it can continue to live in its world where abundance is greedy and unresponsive to its needs. Abundance ends the interaction feeling appreciative; scarcity leaves feeling frustrated. This is a perfectly congruent outcome from all perspectives. Each vibe creates the experience that harmonizes with it.

A few people have been amusing me lately, which I’m grateful for, and I in turn have been doing my part to frustrate them.

If you desire to shift from scarcity to abundance, how do you do that? There are many techniques that I’ve shared in the past, so I won’t rehash that same content here. A good place to start is to watch the Creating Abundance videos. I actually apply this to an even greater extent today than I did when I created those videos in 2009. Now I’m spending much more time each day doing this kind of vibrational work because I find it extremely powerful.

This morning I woke up at 3:30 and then spent a good 2 hours imagining different aspects of my life as I want them to be and getting a clear lock onto the vibes that are consistent with my desires — the thoughts, feelings, and attitudes I believe I’d be experiencing if all my desires were physically real right now.

Then throughout each day, I do my best to hold onto these new vibes as much as possible. When I catch myself slipping into a vibe I wouldn’t likely experience on the side of my new desires, such as frustration or worry, I stop whatever I’m doing, take a deep breath, and reload the vibe I desire. Or if I’m tired and can’t do this very well, I just take a break to distract myself.

I continue to practice this because I find it very effective. Not only do I attract and enjoy more of what I want, but my new vibes also become increasingly repulsive to those whose vibes are incompatible, while becoming more attractive to those with compatible vibes and desires — people with whom I can enjoy co-creating abundantly.

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How Gratitude Can Change Your Life | Marelisa Fabrega

“If the only prayer you say in your life is ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.”

– Meister Eckhart

Gratitude means thankfulness, counting your blessings, noticing simple pleasures, and acknowledging everything that you receive. It means learning to live your life as if everything were a miracle, and being aware on a continuous basis of how much you’ve been given. Gratitude shifts your focus from what your life lacks to the abundance that is already present. In addition, behavioral and psychological research has shown the surprising life improvements that can stem from the practice of gratitude. Giving thanks makes people happier and more resilient, it strengthens relationships, it improves health, and it reduces stress.

Research Shows Gratitude Heightens Quality of Life

Two psychologists, Michael McCollough of Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas, and Robert Emmons of the University of California at Davis, wrote an article about an experiment they conducted on gratitude and its impact on well-being. The study split several hundred people into three different groups and all of the participants were asked to keep daily diaries. The first group kept a diary of the events that occurred during the day without being told specifically to write about either good or bad things; the second group was told to record their unpleasant experiences; and the last group was instructed to make a daily list of things for which they were grateful. The results of the study indicated that daily gratitude exercises resulted in higher reported levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, optimism, and energy. In addition, those in the gratitude group experienced less depression and stress, were more likely to help others, exercised more regularly, and made greater progress toward achieving personal goals.

Dr. Emmons – who has been studying gratitude for almost ten years and is considered by many to be the world’s leading authority on gratitude – is author of the book, “Thanks!: How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier”. The information in this book is based on research involving thousands of people conducted by a number of different researchers around the world. One of the things these studies show is that practicing gratitude can increase happiness levels by around 25%. This is significant, among other things, because just as there’s a certain weight that feels natural to your body and which your body strives to maintain, your basic level of happiness is set at a predetermined point. If something bad happens to you during the day, your happiness can drop momentarily, but then it returns to its natural set-point. Likewise, if something positive happens to you, your level of happiness rises, and then it returns once again to your “happiness set-point”. A practice of gratitude raises your “happiness set-point” so you can remain at a higher level of happiness regardless of outside circumstances.

In addition, Dr. Emmons’ research shows that those who practice gratitude tend to be more creative, bounce back more quickly from adversity, have a stronger immune system, and have stronger social relationships than those who don’t practice gratitude. He further points out that “To say we feel grateful is not to say that everything in our lives is necessarily great. It just means we are aware of our blessings.”

Notice and Appreciate Each Day’s Gifts

People tend to take for granted the good that is already present in their lives. There’s a gratitude exercise that instructs that you should imagine losing some of the things that you take for granted, such as your home, your ability to see or hear, your ability to walk, or anything that currently gives you comfort. Then imagine getting each of these things back, one by one, and consider how grateful you would be for each and every one. In addition, you need to start finding joy in the small things instead of holding out for big achievements—such as getting the promotion, having a comfortable nest egg saved up, getting married, having the baby, and so on–before allowing yourself to feel gratitude and joy.

Another way to use giving thanks to appreciate life more fully is to use gratitude to help you put things in their proper perspective. When things don’t go your way, remember that every difficulty carries within it the seeds of an equal or greater benefit. In the face of adversity ask yourself: “What’s good about this?”, “What can I learn from this?”, and “How can I benefit from this?”

There are Many Ways to Practice Gratitude

A common method to develop the practice of gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal, a concept that was made famous by Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book “Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude". This exercise basically consists of writing down every day a list of three to ten things for which you are grateful; you can do this first thing in the morning or before going to bed at night. Another exercise you can try is to write a gratitude letter to a person who has exerted a positive influence in your life but whom you have not properly thanked. Some experts suggest that you set up a meeting with this person and read the letter to them face to face.

Last year millions of people took the challenge proposed by Will Bowen, a Kansas City minister, to go 21 days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. To help condition the participants to stop complaining, they each wore a purple No-Complaint wristband. Several authors in the self-improvement genre have suggested that people do something similar to help condition themselves to be constantly aware of the things in life that they’re grateful for.

A variation of the wristband concept is to create a gratitude charm bracelet, with either one meaningful charm or different charms representing the things you’re most grateful for. For example, you could have a charm shaped like a heart to symbolize your significant other, figurines to represent different family members, an apple to represent health, a dollar sign to symbolize abundance, a charm that represents your current profession or a future career, and maybe a charm that makes you laugh to represent humor and joy.

Conclusion

Once you become oriented toward looking for things to be grateful for, you will find that you begin to appreciate simple pleasures and things that you previously took for granted. Gratitude should not be just a reaction to getting what you want, but an all-the-time gratitude, the kind where you notice the little things and where you constantly look for the good even in unpleasant situations. Today, start bringing gratitude to your experiences, instead of waiting for a positive experience in order to feel grateful; in this way, you’ll be on your way toward becoming a master of gratitude.

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You are what you think | Louise Hay

Considered one of the founders of the self-help movement, Louise Hay is a spiritual teacher with a wonderful message of how to change your life for the better.
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Neuroscience Reveals How Gratitude Literally Changes Your Brain to be Happier | The Power of Ideas

We often hear about the power of gratitude for creating a more positive and happy mental state. But did you know that gratitude literally transforms your brain?

According to UCLA’s Mindfulness Awareness Research Center, regularly expressing gratitude literally changes the molecular structure of the brain, keeps the gray matter functioning, and makes us healthier and happier.

When you feel happiness, the central nervous system is affected. You are more peaceful, less reactive, and less resistant. And gratitude is the most effective practice for stimulating feelings of happiness.

In this article we’ll share some of the research demonstrating that gratitude makes you happier, followed by some practical steps you can take to positively transform the molecular structure of the brain.

Studies of gratitude making you happier

In one study of gratitude, conducted by Robert A. Emmons at the University of California at Davis and his colleague Mike McCullough at the University of Miami, randomly assigned participants were given one of three tasks. The participants kept a journal each week, with one group describing things they were grateful for, another describing what’s hassling them and the other keeping track of neutral events. After ten weeks, the participants in the gratitude group felt 25 percent better than the other groups, and had exercised an average of 1.5 hours more.

In a later study by Emmons with a similar set up, participants completing gratitude exercises each day offered other people in their lives more emotional support than those in other groups.

Another study on gratitude was conducted with adults suffering from congenital and adult-onset neuromuscular disorders (NMDs), with the majority of people having post-polio syndrome (PPS). 

Compared to those not jotting down what they’re grateful for every night, participants that did express gratitude felt more refreshed each day upon wakening. They also felt more connected with others than did participants in the group not expressing gratitude.

A fourth study didn’t require a gratitude journal, but looked at the amount of gratitude people showed in their daily lives. In this study, a group of Chinese researchers found that higher levels of gratitude were associated with better sleep, and also with lower levels of anxiety and depression.

Better sleep, with less anxiety and depression. Some compelling reasons to express gratitude more regularly.

Three simple steps to becoming more grateful

If you’ve only got time to say one prayer today, make it the simple words of “thank you.”

This is worth keeping in mind as you go about figuring out your daily practices and routines.

Here are three practical steps you can take to infusing routines of gratitude into your life.

1) Keep a daily journal of three things you are thankful for. This works well first thing in the morning, or just before you go to bed.

2) Make it a practice to tell a spouse, partner or friend something you appreciate about them every day.

3) Look in the mirror when you are brushing your teeth, and think about something you have done well recently or something you like about yourself.

Please let me know what you think below.

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Tips On Changing The Way You Feel | Tony Robbins

"Most people want to be happy but their habit is to be worried or frustrated or stressed," says motivational speaker Tony Robbins.

But changing that habit isn't as hard as you might think.

“We all want to be able to change the way we feel. Emotion is created by motion. The way you move determines the way you feel. I have this deal with myself called ‘priming.’ It’s ten minutes, I put music on , I do this massive change in my breathing and then I do this 3-step process,” said Robbins.

1. 3-minutes of gratitude—Think about 3 things I’m really greatful for.
2. 3-minute prayer for family and friends.
3. 3-minute process of the top 3 things I want to accomplish.

“My deal is 10 so there is no excuse not to do it,” said Robbins.

Let me know what you think below!

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15 Signposts on the Path to Success| Jeff Keller

People on the path of growth apply certain principles that allow them to achieve more and lead rich, rewarding lives. If you’re on the path to success, you are a different person than you were five years ago. You think differently. You act differently. You see the world differently. In short, you’re growing and evolving.

But unlike our physical growth, where we can clearly see and gauge our progress (or lack thereof), it is often difficult to measure our personal and professional growth. There is no simple test we can take to assess personal growth, but here are some “signposts” that we can use to gain insight into where we stand.

As you read through this article, measure your present situation against these signposts of personal and professional growth. Consider if you already embrace these ideals or how you might implement them on a more consistent basis.

1. Don’t Fix Blame or Make Excuses 
You realize more and more that pointing a finger at others is not the answer to your problems. Instead, you take personal responsibility for your own results and your own 
happiness. You focus on your attitude, your skills, your actions, and your discipline.

2. Don’t Look Back 
Dwelling on unpleasant events in the past won’t change them, and it only makes you feel rotten in the present. So why do it? Part of accepting personal responsibility is the recognition that, at any point, you can change the path you’re on. Learn from the past, but don’t obsess on it. Instead, take action today to create a positive future.

3. Guard the Sanctity of Your Thoughts 
You no longer doubt that your thoughts are creating your reality. And, if that’s the case, why would you ever think negatively? You’re disciplining yourself to focus on what you want, as opposed to what you don’t want.

4. Have a Sense of Gratitude Every Day 
When you’re young, you tend to take everything for granted: your health, the roof over your head, and the food on your plate. As the years go by, you suddenly experience the “darker” side of life. Either you or your relatives or friends face serious illnesses. You personally know people in their 30s, 40s, or 50s who die. Instead of complaining about the things in your life that aren’t perfect, you choose to be thankful for the many gifts you’ve been given. You identify with the sage advice of Eddie Rickenbacker, who once said, “If you have all the fresh water you want to drink and all the food you want to eat, you should never complain about anything.”

5. Laugh a Lot More, Especially at Yourself
Several times each day, you find yourself letting out a hearty belly laugh. You take your work seriously but not yourself. Whether you’re with clients, colleagues, friends, or family, make sure to laugh. You’ll feel better and have a lot more fun.

6. Get Excited About Something
When you’re living in the flow of life and up to your highest potential, you’re enthusiastic. You don’t have to go around slapping people on the back, but you’re upbeat and alive. You get up in the morning with a purpose, and you look forward to the day’s activities. People can just look at you, or speak with you, and immediately pick up on your positive energy.

7. Take Some Risks
No one is asking you to go skydiving or put your physical health at risk. However, the path of growth demands that you venture into the unknown. That’s where you discover yourself, and find out what you’re capable of achieving. You begin to get ideas and visions about great things you can accomplish, and you have the courage to go after them! Instead of just thinking about doing something, you take action and do it!

8. Be Less Concerned with What Other People Think
Do you still need to get someone’s approval before making a decision? On the path to success, you’re willing to do what you think is best for you, even if someone else won’t like it. On fundamental issues such as your career, your relationships, and your goals, it’s fine to get advice. But in the end, it’s your view that counts. You’ll never be happy following someone 
else’s plan for your life.

9. Place More Emphasis on Honesty and Integrity
Even when no one is looking, you do the right thing. Your aim is to build solid long-term relationships, both personally and professionally, and you can’t accomplish this unless you’re a person of character and integrity. Aside from being good to others, this is for your own self-interest. You see, whatever you send out in life will come back to you like a boomerang. You know that for people to treat you with honesty and respect, you must treat them the same way.

10. Stop Trying to ‘Fix’ Others
You’ve learned that a little self-development can be dangerous. While you’ve begun to see that there’s a better way to live and you’re anxious for others to “see the light” as well, you recognize that everyone has his or her own path to follow, and that you don’t decide the rate at which someone else progresses. So, instead of “converting” others, you continue to work on yourself and find that your example is more powerful than any sermon you can preach.

11. Take the Opportunity to Lift Someone Else
You remember how tough it was for you at each level of your life and your career, and how challenging it is right now! Furthermore, you know that you are where you now are, in large part, because some people believed in you, encouraged you, and helped you. You make a point to do the same for those who can benefit from your experience.

12. See Things in Perspective
Your list of what’s truly important in your life continues to shrink. You work hard and enjoy whatever material comforts you have, but “things” are not as essential to you as they once were. You recognize that your health and well-being and that of your loved ones is what really matters. You no longer let little day-to-day annoyances (at work or at home) dictate the attitude, pace, or results of your day.

13. Listen More … and Ask Questions
You’ve learned to tame your ego a bit and don’t feel the need to always be the center of attention. You realize that when you’re talking, you’re not learning anything. You balance your conversations and make sure to draw other people out by asking questions. You’re more interested in learning about their thoughts, ideas, and insights on various issues, their careers, and their families. Every person has a fascinating story to tell, and you want to hear it!

14. Discover That Discipline Is Fun
You never thought you’d say that! Yet it’s true. To build physical fitness, you exercise several times each week. To develop a successful sales career, you pay attention to the basics, day in and day out. You’re no longer looking for the “quick fix” or “quick buck.” Instead, you know full well that you must put in the effort before you can reap the reward. You find tremendous satisfaction in sticking with something and mastering it over a period of time.

15. Set High Standards for Yourself and Others
Careful, this isn’t about achieving “perfection.” Rather, on the path to success, you simply have the desire to reach more and more of your potential. You no longer settle for less than your best effort. And, as you see more of the potential in others, you encourage them to develop their talents as well.

These are 15 signposts on your road to personal and professional success. I’m sure you can add several more items as well, based on your own experiences. Keep these ideas in front of you on a regular basis to gauge your progress. Apply them consistently and you’ll enjoy phenomenal results, plus a tremendously exciting journey!

Learn more about Jeff Keller and his bestselling book Attitude Is Everything.

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27 Things You Need To Thank Yourself For Before The Year’s Over | Russell Lacy

In our society, we beat up on ourselves a lot – too much.

For many of us, it’s every minute of every day, all throughout the year. It’s no wonder most of us are too stressed out. We replay negative thoughts about our inadequacies or lack of capabilities over and over again in our minds. At some point, it’s like enough already. Isn’t it about time that we started appreciating ourselves for all of the things that we’ve done? This is especially true for this time of year.
 

Along with some end-of-the-year reflection and goal planning for the new year, don’t forget to thank yourself for all that you have achieved and overcome this year. I’m sure there were moments when it wasn’t easy. You probably had moments when you doubted yourself, struggled in defining the type of life you want to live, and lost sight of your goals. Yet, you pushed through it all.
 

Now, take a moment to be proud of the person who you’ve become. Here are 27 things you need to thank yourself for before 2016 is over:

 1. Following your goals (well, some of them)

 2. Making your priorities clearer and sticking to them

 3. Not putting up with people’s crap

 4. Taking time out for yourself, even if that meant ditching your friends

 5. Working out more/ trying to take care of yourself more

 6. Not settling for things

 7. Developing your skills and passions

 8. Not giving up on your what you want out of your career (even when it got on your nerves)

 9. Finishing things that you started

 10. Having the courage to remove people out of your life who didn’t add to it

 11. Speaking up more when you felt wronged

 12. Going the extra mile (though you didn’t always want to)

 13. Getting more sleep

 14. Following your gut (even if that meant venturing into unfamiliar territory)

 15. Persevering through the unexpected

 16. Not beating up on yourself as much

 17. Accepting your flaws, regardless of what people might think

 18. Deciding not to take life so seriously

 19. Laughing a heck of a lot more

 20. Not doing the same dumb things that you did in 2015

 21. Not reminding yourself of the dumb things you did in 2015

 22. Spending more time with your family

 23. Saving more. Finally.

 24. Planning for the life you want in the future

 25. Being more grateful for the little things.

 26. Making choices that you know your future self would be proud of

 27. Being patient with yourself, knowing through every journey you face you’re becoming wiser

Have a go and let me know what you think!  Would you change any of the items above?

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Appreciation Quotes Help Forge Friendship - Make Your Gratitude Count | Simran Khurana

Appreciating someone is not that difficult. You just need to remember to express your appreciation when the opportunity arises. But how many of us remember to do so?

Voltaire rightly pointed out the merits of appreciation, "Appreciation is a wonderful thing: It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well." When you appreciate your loved ones, you build a bond of trust and love.  Appreciation builds bridges and fosters healthy relationships. 

Appreciate Those Who Are Closest to You

Appreciation can start at home. When your mother packs you a nutritious lunch, or your dad helps you with homework, show your appreciation with a hug or a smile. When your husband helps you with household chores, or your mother-in-law offers to babysit when you had to go out, express gratitude and love.

Appreciate Others Around You

Appreciate people outside your family too. Give your neighbors credit when their dogs did not create a nuisance. Thank the local police for their effort in controlling the crime rate in the neighborhood. 

You can find many opportunities to express your appreciation.

Appreciating someone does not make you less important. This is not a war of ego. Your words of appreciation reveal your humble and generous nature. By appreciating others, your value does not depreciate! On the contrary, you look good in the eyes of others.

Is Appreciation the Same Thing as Flattery?

Renowned motivational speaker Dale Carnegie beautifully expressed the difference between appreciation and flattery.  He said, "The difference between appreciation and flattery? That is simple. One is sincere and the other insincere. One comes from the heart out; the other from the teeth out. One is unselfish; the other selfish. One is universally admired; the other universally condemned."

Sugarcoated words of flattery appear fake while discerning words of appreciation sound genuine. Appreciation makes specific mention of praise-worthy qualities. Flattery is wishy-washy, smothering the truth behind a veil of false words. You can instinctively tell if a person is expressing true appreciation or false flattery. 

How to Appreciate Someone?

Appreciation should be sincere. When you praise your mother for her cooking, talk about what you specifically liked about the food. Share your thoughts about what else you would like. And thank her profusely for making your meal so good.

Say "thanks" to your friend who threw you a surprise birthday party. If your friend has spent money for the party, offer to share the expense. Also, tell your friend what you enjoyed most about the birthday celebration.

Use these appreciation quotes to make beautiful thank you cards and messages. Your friends and family will remember you for the kind words of appreciation.

Walt Disney
Animation can explain whatever the mind of man can conceive. This facility makes it the most versatile and explicit means of communication yet devised for quick mass appreciation.

Booker T. Washington
Any man's life will be filled with constant and unexpected encouragement if he makes up his mind to do his level best each day.

Lucius Annaeus Seneca
We become wiser by adversity; prosperity destroys our appreciation of the right.

Sam Walton
Appreciate everything your associates do for the business. Nothing else can quite substitute for a few well-chosen, well-timed, sincere words of praise. They're absolutely free and worth a fortune.

Voltaire
Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.

John F. Kennedy
As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.

Oprah Winfrey
Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.

Albert Schweitzer
At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.

Dalai Lama
The roots of all goodness lie in the soil of appreciation for goodness.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Correction does much, but encouragement does more. Encouragement after censure is as the sun after a shower.

Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.

Leo Buscaglia
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

Michael Jordan
When I was playing before I retired, I never really understood the appreciation and the respect that people gave me. People had treated me like a god or something, and that was very embarrassing.

Henry Clay
Courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike deepest in the gratefully and appreciating heart.

Mark Twain
To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.

Friedrich Nietzsche
There are slavish souls who carry their appreciation for favors done them so far that they strangle themselves with the rope of gratitude.

Mae West
Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!

Steve Maraboli
Forget yesterday -- it has already forgotten you. Don't sweat tomorrow -- you haven't even met. Instead, open your eyes and your heart to a truly precious gift -- today.

William Arthur
Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I may not forget you.

Ralph Waldo Emerson
The invariable mark of wisdom is to see the miraculous in the common.

Source 

Let me know what you think below!

If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place | Wayne Dyer

This is wonderful!  Hope you enjoy it!  Let me know what you think below!

Source: 

Finding Your Purpose | Dr John Demartini

Your purpose is inherent. If you are unclear on what it is, it is waiting to be revealed from deep within your heart. It is simply clouded over by your mind’s seven primary fears that block its realization and fullest expression. To transcend these fears – kneel down at the side of your bed at the end of each day before going to sleep with a note pad and pen in hand. 

Think about everything you can be grateful for from that day and make a list of experiences that you can truly be grateful for until you are so grateful a tear comes out of your eyes. Then turn inward to your most authentic and powerful self – your soul – and ask: 

“What message do you have for me today?” 

“What action step am I to take to fulfill my life?” 

“What detail can you reveal about my life mission or vision?” 

If you don’t receive a message immediately then go back and think more deeply about what you’re truly grateful for and then ask these questions again. 

If you are truly grateful a vision or message will be immediate, loud and clear. When this voice and vision on the inside becomes louder and more profound than all opinions on the outside you have begun to master your life. Do these actions for at least thirty days until you no longer have to ask the question about what your mission or purpose is. You will then know with certainty. Then add to this insight by thinking about what you know you would love to do and write it down. Start with what you know with certainty and let what you know grow. Read it, refine it, read it, refine it, and keep reading it and refining it until it becomes crystal clear. 

Also review all the heroes you have had in your life and look for what is common to them – they leave clues and review all the jobs or careers you have had and look for what is common – they also leave clues. Add all this up and you will have a great idea or first draft of what your mission or purpose is. The true you, has a profound contribution to offer the world. The true you, does not play small. The true you, is brilliant beyond compare. 

Source: https://drdemartini.com/blog/finding-your-purpose/

Simple and effective.