4 Steps To Live Your Life Fearlessly Beyond Approval | Art Von Sy

Each one of us was born with something unique and powerful to contribute to the world. And it’s living this deepest essence of our self that leads us to the outrageous levels of spiritual and material success so many seek. This electric sense of purpose is something we can all access and live out in the world.

But sometimes it feels as if the cards are stacked against us. Whether you become anxious the closer you reach these little nuggets of success, or hesitant to cultivate and manifest your dreams into reality, the fear and desire of approval can be a stifling force on your creative existence.

It’s not only liberating but also euphoric to live life without the stresses of wondering what other people think. A life where you are free to act, do, experiment, and execute in just the way that is unique to you, is a life that is not only worth living, but worth crushing all self-doubt for.

Here are the 4 steps to live your life beyond the need for approval:

1. Collapse All Hierarchies

It’s a default reflex. We constantly create hierarchies. Put some people above us and others below us, out of fear and self-preservation. These hierarchies are not real, they exist only in our minds. Yet most people never question them and subordinate their existence, their sense of self and level of freedom to those they place above themselves.

And this not only gives other people’s opinion power over you, it makes you diminish yourself in order not to upset anyone who has that power.

Become aware of the unconscious hierarchies you create and collapse them in your mind. This will free you from the fear and desire of approval by stripping those you’ve unwittingly given that power over you and claim back for yourself.

“So rather than be frustrated with what you can’t control, try to fix the things you can.” – Kevin Garnett

2. Collapse Your Equations

Most of our reality is a reality created by language. And language has a binary structure. This leads to usual black and white thinking. The biggest fear we have is not the lack of success, but the opposite of it.

As you go through life, you are in a constant negotiation with your objects of desires and your objects of avoidance. Because of the distortions in our thinking, we mistakenly believe that our objects of avoidance and our objects of desire are mutually exclusive.

Put differently, sometimes we are so attached to success and afraid of failure that we put more energy into preventing failure than pursuing success. When you realize that your equations are just assumptions, you break out of the box and learn to act with a wider scope of effortlessness and possibilities.

3. Forget Yourself

Most people in the personal development world like to speak of our limiting beliefs and presumed obstacles. But we tend to forget the biggest obstacle of all. The idea we have of ourselves.

The more rigid our self-concept the more restricted our world. Things can only affect you if you cannot suspend your idea of yourself and adapt it to the situation. When your identity is rigid it becomes brittle, when it is flexible it is fluid, and things that used to unsettle you cease to do so. 

Why? Because if you have no fixed idea of yourself, nothing can break you.

Challenges just become a learning experience. Everything turns into feedback to integrate. And this flexibility dissolves the anxieties that you may not be good enough, because you are on the fast lane to growth.

"We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be.” – May Sarton

4. Focus On Your Values, Embody Your Vision

When we are disconnected from our deepest values we are easily swayed to follow the hive mind. Your existential value is what you would readily sacrifice and give up anything for. Knowing this value, and remembering it in any moment gives you tremendous power.

And if you have a vision that resonates with it, the daily discomforts will barely register on your radar. Because when you play the biggest game possible by knowing exactly what you want on the highest level, the desire for approval disappears completely.

You become what you focus on. And focusing on your deepest values and vision, eventually turns you and your life into them. The freedom you will experience from the powerful clarity of not only knowing exactly what you want, but embodying it, leads to a profound sense of purposeful freedom.

This is the freedom from fear; the ability to be beyond approval that lends an effortlessness to all your actions to make your unique impact on the world.

Source: http://addicted2success.com/life/4-steps-to-live-your-life-fearlessly-beyond-approval/

Abraham: GETTING INTO THE VORTEX: THE BIG ONE | Esther & Jerry Hicks

Abraham explains the secret of their new Guided Meditations CD and User Guide entitled "Getting Into The Vortex". Then they comment upon the use and misuse of "effort", and reveal the ultimate process - "The Big One" - for getting into the Vortex, where all dreams come true. Finally, the video concludes with an audio preview of the Meditation CD

Source: https://youtu.be/1-4TqHp2BnE

Isn't it great?  Let me know what you think!

How to Tip From Scarcity to Abundance | Steve Pavlina

You must be shapeless, formless, like water. When you pour water in a cup, it becomes the cup. When you pour water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle. When you pour water in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can drip and it can crash. Become like water, my friend. ― Bruce Lee

Many people struggle to shift from a scarcity-based lifestyle to an abundance-based lifestyle. In this article I’ll share some of the shifts that people have experienced shortly before they reach their abundance tipping point, with the intention of helping you reach your own abundance tipping point sooner. I’ve also included some quotes from Bruce Lee for an extra dose of inspiration.

Reclaim Your Dignity

Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them. ― Bruce Lee

When people are in scarcity, they often do things that make them feel undignified. They may take actions and subject themselves to experiences they aren’t proud of.

When a person is about to shift into abundance, this sense of human dignity (if it was ever lost) is reclaimed. In fact, one’s personal dignity becomes an important part of the vision of abundance.

Being in scarcity doesn’t mean you’re incompetent. It doesn’t mean you’re unprofessional. It doesn’t make you a second class human being. Scarcity does not dictate a lowering of your self-esteem.

The same year I shifted was the year I decided to stop tolerating the indignities of scarcity. Just because I was broke and in debt didn’t mean that I should tolerate the abuse of creditors calling me 10 times a day and trying to trick or manipulate me. Just because I was behind on rent didn’t mean I had to tolerate a rude landlord. Just because I needed income didn’t mean I had to subject myself to working with unethical or incompetent people.

I couldn’t immediately control my financial situation. It was a mess, and I knew that. But my desperation and the willingness to accept abuse were optional.

Are you currently tolerating any indignities in your life? Do your friends, family, and co-workers treat you with respect, regardless of your income or employment? If you owe people money, do your creditors treat you as a mature and responsible adult? Or are you treated with shame, guilt, and derision for your situation?

Realize that regardless of your current situation, you still deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. That is your right as a human being, but you must be willing to enforce that right if people try to violate it.

Reclaiming your dignity also means refusing to beat yourself up, even when you’ve made mistakes. You do not have to stoop over just because some aspects of your life haven’t been working so well. Forgive yourself for any perceived failures. Stand tall once again.

Do not seek shame in scarcity nor pride in abundance. Both are part of the human experience, so allow yourself to retain your humanity across the board.

Reframe the Scarce Times

Don’t fear failure. Not failure, but low aim, is the crime. In great attempts it is glorious even to fail. ― Bruce Lee

Another aspect of reclaiming your dignity is to recognize that you’re accumulating memories as you go through life, and those memories will be with you for a long time.

You may not be able to control all the pictures that become part of your memories, but you do have control over how you frame them. If you frame your memories with resistance, you’ll accumulate a stockpile of stress, which may cause you to look back on those years with regret. If you frame your memories with appreciation, you’ll accumulate stockpiles of appreciation that you’ll later cherish.

Before people shift into abundance, they often begin to reframe their years of scarcity. They realize that framing those years with stress, frustration, and resistance wasn’t such a good idea because they’re filling their mind with painful memories, which can’t possibly do much good. So they decide to stop accumulating so much emotional baggage and to look for better ways to frame the past and present.

Even if the external scarcity is to continue for a while, it makes no sense to wrap it in stress. The experiences may be necessary, but the added suffering is optional.

When I look back on my scarcest years, I regret that I wrapped so much stress into them. In hindsight it will be obvious to you as well that the stress wasn’t necessary.

After you’ve been living on the abundance side for many years, how will you look back on your scarcest years? Will they still stress you out? That would be silly if those years are in your past. You’ll probably look back on those years with compassion, understanding, and maybe some nostalgia as well. You may also reflect on some of the lessons you learned during those years.

If you can begin to feel such feelings now, even if you’re still experiencing scarce times, it will help you tip to abundance.

Expand Your Definition of Abundance

If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. ― Bruce Lee

When people are stuck in scarcity, they often equate abundance with financial or material wealth. Abundance is money in the bank, being debt-free, having a nice home, and enjoying some quality possessions.

This is the socially conditioned version of abundance we learn from childhood. The problem with this vision is that we’re also conditioned to have mixed feelings about it. Do we really want the life of Ebenezer Scrooge? What’s the point if we end up with lots of money and possessions, but we’re sad and lonely?

When people get closer to their abundance tipping point, they typically go through a process of redefining, expanding, and personalizing their definition of abundance. This process is different for each person, but most of the time it involves replacing an overly narrow definition of abundance with a more holistic version. Instead of abundance being just about wealth, the vision expands to include good health and energy, positive feelings, happy relationships, new growth experiences, fulfillment, spiritual alignment, etc.

Even after you tip into abundance, you’ll continue to revise your definition of abundance. The way you define aspects like quality of life or happy relationships will change as you learn and grow. But most likely your biggest shifts will happen shortly before your initial tipping point.

One reason many people don’t reach their tipping point is because this shift is counter-intuitive. It’s easy to fall into the trap of assuming that a narrower and more limited version of abundance should be easier to achieve. Then we can add more to it after we pass that first hump. But the limited vision kills our motivation and inspiration. It’s only when we ask for the total package that we start summoning the inspired ideas and motivated actions to make it real.

Define a New Relationship with Life

Relationship is understanding. It is a process of self-revelation. Relationship is the mirror in which you discover yourself – to be is to be related. ― Bruce Lee

As you approach your abundance tipping point, it may feel like going through a relationship breakup. You surrender to the fact that the old relationship isn’t working and that it has to change.

This relationship is a mirror though, so you’re the one who has to change. When you change, life will change because life is the reflection.

You can’t just break up with life, but you can renegotiate the relationship. You can choose to stop resisting what life has been doling out, and you can begin to work with life more cooperatively.

For me this shift involved deciding to always give life the benefit of the doubt. I realized that I could believe that life (or the universe) was always on my side, or I could believe it was sometimes against me or indifferent. I thought long and hard about what it would be like to adopt one lens or the other.

This isn’t a question of truth. You can’t objectively know whether the universe cares about you or not. You can always find evidence on both sides. So this is purely a subjective decision, albeit one that will have objective consequences for you.

I concluded that I would likely enjoy a better quality of life if I did my best to give the universe the benefit of the doubt, regardless of what situations and events happened to me. This meant trying to view every setback as a lesson, perhaps even a gift. Instead of being frustrated and disappointed when I didn’t get what I wanted, I’d try to be curious. I’d live my life as a perpetual student – in wonder, open, and flexible, and never sour or bitter towards life’s apparent transgressions. I could always find a way to interpret life’s attitude towards me as being helpful, playful, or educational.

I decided that the universe wants me to be happy and to enjoy an abundant existence. The only thing that might get in my way is my own stubbornness and inflexibility.

Your renegotiation process will probably be different than mine. The pattern I’ve seen in others is that they admit that the old relationship with life has been broken and that it has to change. They realize that it makes no sense to go another one year, five years, or ten years with the relationship the way it is. Something has to change.

To tip into abundance, you need to find some way to make the universe your ally. In your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs, you must stop resisting what the universe is bringing you. Learn to welcome whatever arises with as little resistance as possible. See all experience as a gift.

Bruce Lee did not have to cultivate a positive relationship with life. He could have succumbed to a dysfunctional relationship if he didn’t do his part to stay conscious. He had his share of potential disappointments. For instance, he helped develop the TV series Kung Fu but was not allowed to star in it. Warner Brothers was concerned that American audiences wouldn’t accept a Chinese actor in that role, so they hired David Carradine for the role instead, and Carradine wasn’t even a martial artist. Bruce responded with incredible understanding: “They think that business-wise it is a risk. I don’t blame them. If the situation were reversed, and an American star were to come to Hong Kong, and I was the man with the money, I would have my own concerns as to whether the acceptance would be there.”

When people approach their abundance tipping point, they see that they can never hope to experience abundance without the commitment to give the universe the benefit of the doubt. How can you possibly fight with life and expect to win?

This kind of surrender is not passive. It is not giving up. It is kung fu in the true meaning of the term.

Be Humble

It is not a shame to be knocked down by other people. The important thing is to ask when you’re being knocked down, “Why am I being knocked down?” If a person can reflect in this way, then there is hope for this person. ― Bruce Lee

As an extension of the previous item, there’s a newfound feeling of humility that often arises before tipping to abundance. You admit that maybe — just maybe — you don’t know everything there is to know about abundance yet. You admit that there must be more to learn, despite how much you may have read, studied, and worked towards abundance already.

It can take a long time to reach this point. You may go through many cycles of pushing, pushing, pushing, then feeling disappointed with the results, and then taking a break for a while. This pattern is especially common if you read a lot of books about wealth building.

When you recognize that you’ve been running through repetitive cycles, you may feel inclined to step off the treadmill for a while. And that’s when you know you’re getting closer to tipping. The treadmill stops when you relax your mind and allow yourself to become a true student of life once again.

When your mind is filled to the brim with ideas about what should work (but hasn’t), it’s hard to release scarcity because that constant churning drains you and keep you from feeling strong and centered. When you shift to humble curiosity instead of frantic scrambling, you’re getting close to a powerful transition.

Be Patient

You can never invite the wind, but you must leave the window open. ― Bruce Lee

Impatience is like yelling at the wind to blow. It creates more tension, but it only perpetuates scarcity. The wind will blow when it’s ready.

If you exhaust yourself trying to force the wind to blow, then when the wind finally does blow, you won’t be ready for it. You’ll be watching for a tornado, and you’ll miss the gentle breeze of opportunity.

When people shift from scarcity to abundance, they stop trying to stir up tornados. Even if you manage to catch a tornado, it actually just blows you in circles at high speeds and deposits you (somewhat bruised and battered) roughly where you began. You race ahead like a maniac, time passes, and later on you realize that you’ve dragged your scarcity mindset with you the whole way.

When you’re in a state of abundance, it will feel more like a gentle breeze that carries you along. When abundance is your normal, everyday reality, you won’t be flailing your arms and screaming. You’ll just relax and coast.

If you want to tip more easily, relax into long-term patience. Free yourself of demands and expectations. Align yourself with the breeze, not the tornado. Feel the subtle energies of abundance, and seek to release the perpetual thrashing of scarcity.

Channel Your Creative Power

As long as I can remember, I feel I have had this great creative and spiritual force within me that is greater than faith, greater than ambition, greater than confidence, greater than determination, greater than vision. It is all these combined. My brain becomes magnetized with this dominating force which I hold in my hand. ― Bruce Lee

A final sign that a person is ready to shift is that they begin to reclaim their creative power. They stop using scarcity to disempower themselves, and they see that they are stronger than scarcity.

To leave scarcity behind, tune into that great creator spirit that’s been lying dormant inside of you. Let it out to play, without trying to put a leash on it. Stop trying to force your creative spirit to solve your petty financial problems, and let it soar in the direction it wants to go.

Allow the scarcity to be there, and turn your attention to that which is incompatible with scarcity. A scarcity-minded person cannot create, cannot express, cannot shine. So shine in the face of scarcity, and scarcity will no longer have power over you.

As Bruce Lee shared, “It is not, ‘I am doing this,’ but rather, an inner realization that ‘this is happening through me,’ or ‘it is doing this for me.'”

Are you ready to let this creative spirit flow through you – without trying to harness it to your oxcart of scarcity woes? If you’re ready to let this energy run freely through you, you’re ready for abundance.

* * *

In 2010 I visited Bruce Lee’s grave in Seattle, which was a moving experience. He only lived for 32 years. His son Brandon is buried next to him, and Brandon only lived for 28 years.

On Brandon’s grave the following words are inscribed:

Because we don’t know when we will die, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. Yet everything happens a certain number of times, and a very small number, really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that’s so deeply a part of your being that you can’t even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more. Perhaps not even that. How many times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.

We don’t know what the universe has in store for us. We don’t know when our time here will end. We only know that this human life is temporary. Can you appreciate the preciousness of a temporary experience?

If you’d like some help on your journey to abundance, I encourage you to join us at the Conscious Abundance Workshop July 29-31. This workshop has a simple purpose: to help you tip your life from scarcity to abundance.

Enjoy your journey, my friend.

Source: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2016/07/how-to-tip-scarcity-abundance/

I hope you found this useful.  Do please let me know below. 

Jack Canfield: Create Your Attitude

Uploaded on Apr 19, 2007
Buy Jack Canfield products at http://www.yoursuccessstore.com/index...

You probably know Jack Canfield as the founder and co-creator of the New York Times No. 1 best-selling Chicken Soup for the Soul book series, which currently has over 35 titles and 53 million copies in print in over 32 languages.

What you may not know is that Jack is also the founder of Self Esteem Seminars located in Santa Barbara, California, which trains entrepreneurs, educators, corporate leaders and employees how to accelerate the achievement of their personal and professional goals. Jack is also the Founder of The Foundation for Self Esteem located in Culver City, California, which provides self-esteem resources and trainings to social workers, welfare recipients and human resource professionals.

But if you really want to know who Jack Canfield is, he is BEST described as an understanding, compelling, empowering and compassionate coach who has helped hundreds of thousands of people achieve their dreams.

Was that useful?

Source: https://youtu.be/tUBJReN4GnM

Dalai Lama's guide to happiness

This video looks at 'Buddhism and Happiness', as we ask are they a match made in heaven or something else? This eight minute epic reveals some incredible insights into human behaviour and values that impact our happiness, particularly in this materialistic Western life so many are living, or reaching for.

The Dalai Lama is an incredible man. His message here is simple and straight forward. Let me know what you think of it.

Link: https://youtu.be/IUEkDc_LfKQ

How to Know When You've Found Your Purpose in Life | Oprah & Carolyn Myss

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyN5tK0Varc

Published on Jun 24, 2012

Author Caroline Myss says each of us has a sacred contract‰: a set of assignments our soul was meant to complete. Here, she shares a list of telltale signs that you are fulfilling your divine potential in life. Plus, watch as Oprah has an aha! moment during their conversation about being true to herself. For more on #supersoulsunday, visit http://bit.ly/1tNw5dg 

One Quick Exercise For Planning Your Life | Marshall Goldsmith

My friend, designer Ayse Birsel, recently taught me an incredibly powerful way to be more successful. Of course, as you know success is defined by the person who wants to achieve it. Success could be a new job, a better relationship with your spouse, a great school for your kids, a bigger salary, or all of the above. Everyone is different. This exercise will work for anyone! For me, success is achieving my mission: helping successful people get even better.

According to Ayse, our point of view informs how we think about something. Last year I was ranked the #1 Leadership Thinker and the #1 Executive Coach in the World. My book, Triggers, was a New York Times #1 bestseller. I have definitely achieved a high level of success in my mission! As a coach and executive educator, I am helping many successful organizations and leaders be more successful. As an author whose books reach millions of people, I believe I am helping many people achieve positive, lasting change for themselves.

Ayse suggested that I try a little exercise to expand my point of view, to look at myself and what I do and see differently. Of course, I did as she asked and the result has been phenomenal!

Why don’t you try this exercise now? (This exercise is Adapted from Design the Life You Love: A Step-by-Step Guide to Building a Meaningful Future, by Ayse Birsel, published by Ten Speed Press, an imprint of Penguin Random House.)

Ayse says, “Here inspiration is a key tool. When designing your life inspiration takes the form of other people. I call them heroes—real or fictional—people we know personally or know of.”

“Just write your hero’s name, draw an icon for them, and list their qualities. You can have one or many heroes—list as many as you’d like and continue to add as new heroes come to mind. These heroes tell us something about our values, beliefs, and the kind of life we aspire to live. Many things can change in life but our values are a constant. They are the foundation of our life design.”

Now cross out your heroes’ names and put in your own name. To the degree possible, be a leader, manager, coach, person just like that, and you will be more successful!

In doing this exercise myself, I found that all of my heroes are generous teachers, like Buddha, Frances Hesselbein (former Girl Scout CEO), Alan Mulally (former Ford CEO), Peter Drucker (Father of Modern Management), and Paul Hersey (Co-creator of Situation Leadership®). Reflecting on what I learned from my heroes, I made a decision. I decided that just like my many teachers before me, I will give to others what has been so freely given to me.

How will I do this? With my new project 15 Coaches. 15 Coaches is my legacy project. I am going to teach 15 people everything I know, for free! This is my chance to honor the many wonderful teachers and heroes that I have had over the years and to give to others as they gave to me. If you would like more details, please go to http://www.marshallgoldsmith.com/15-coaches/.

Triggers is a #1 New York Times and Wall Street Journal best-seller! Order it at Amazon. See The Marshall Goldsmith Thinkers50 Video Blog for more of this video series.

Source: http://www.marshallgoldsmith.com/articles/an-incredibly-powerful-way-to-be-more-successful/

Top 10 Rules For Success | Wayne Dyer

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=heAJyDfOTiY&t=759s

These are great!  Its amazing to see how his appearance has changed over the years: it reminds me of Sarah Beeney's changing forms in her property programmes.  Don't let it spoil the message...

How to Get Better at Dealing with Change | Nick Tasler

Change is an unavoidable constant in our work lives. Sometimes it’s within our control, but most often it’s not. Our jobs or roles change — and not always for the better. Our organizations undergo reorgs and revamp their strategies, and we need to adjust.

Fortunately, there are ways to adapt to change, and even to take advantage of it.

Find the humor in the situation. Trying to find a funny moment during an otherwise unfunny situation can be a fantastic way to create the levity needed to see a vexing problem from a new perspective. It can help others feel better as well.

Pioneering humor researcher Rod A. Martin, who has studied the effects of different styles of humor, has found that witty banter, or “affiliative humor,” can lighten the mood and improve social interaction. Just make sure it’s inclusive and respectful. A good rule of thumb is that other people’s strife is no laughing matter, but your own struggles can be a source of comedic gold.

Talk about problems more than feelings. One of the most common myths of coping with unwanted changes is the idea that we can “work through” our anger, fears, and frustrations by talking about them a lot. This isn’t always the case. In fact, research shows that actively and repeatedly broadcasting negative emotions hinders our natural adaptation processes.

That’s not to say you should just “suck it up” or ignore your troubles. Instead, call out your anxiety or your anger at the outset of a disorienting change so that you are aware of how it might distort your thinking or disrupt your relationships. Then look for practical advice about what to do next. By doing so, you’ll zero in on the problems you can solve, instead of lamenting the ones you can’t.

Don’t stress out about stressing out. Our beliefs about stress matter. As Stanford psychologist Kelly McGonigal argues in The Upside of Stress, your reaction to stress has a greater impact on your health and success than the stress itself. If you believe stress kills you, it will. If you believe stress is trying to carry you over a big obstacle or through a challenging situation, you’ll become more resilient and may even live longer.

When you start to feel stressed, ask yourself what your stress is trying to help you accomplish. Is stress trying to help you excel at an important task, like a sales presentation or a big interview? Is it trying to help you endure a period of tough market conditions or a temporary shift in your organizational structure? Is it trying to help you empathize with a colleague or a customer? Or is stress to trying to help you successfully exit a toxic situation?

Stress can be a good thing — if you choose to see it that way.

Focus on your values instead of your fears. Reminding ourselves of what’s important to us — family, friends, religious convictions, scientific achievement, great music, creative expression, and so on — can create a surprisingly powerful buffer against whatever troubles may be ailing us.

In a series of studies spanning more than a decade, researchers led by Geoffrey Cohen and David Sherman have shown how people of all ages in a range of circumstances, from new schools and new relationships to new jobs, can strengthen their minds with a simple exercise: spending 10 minutes writing about a time when a particular value you hold has positively affected you.

The technique works because reflecting on a personal value helps us rise above the immediate threat, and makes us realize that our personal identity can’t be compromised by one challenging situation.

Accept the past, but fight for the future. Even though we are never free from change, we are always free to decide how we respond to it.

Viktor Frankl championed this idea after returning home from three horrific years in Nazi death camps. He discovered that his mother, brother, wife, and unborn child were all dead. Everything in his life had changed. All that he loved was lost. But as fall became winter and winter gave way to spring, Frankl began to discover that even though he could never go back to the life he once had, he was still free to meet new friends, find new love, become a father again, work with new patients, enjoy music, and read books. Frankl called his hope in the face of despair “tragic optimism.”

Frankl’s story is an extreme example, of course, but that’s all the more reason why we should find inspiration from it. If we fixate on the limitations of a specific change, we inevitably succumb to worry, bitterness, and despair.

Instead, we should choose to accept the fact that change happens, and employ our freedom to decide what to do next.

Don’t expect stability. In the late 1970s a researcher at the University of Chicago named Salvatore Maddi began studying employees at Illinois Bell. Soon after, the phone industry was deregulated, and the company had to undergo a lot of changes. Some managers had trouble coping. Others thrived. What separated the two groups?

The adaptive leaders chose to view all changes, whether wanted or unwanted, as an expected part of the human experience, rather than as a tragic anomaly that victimizes unlucky people. Instead of feeling personally attacked by ignorant leaders, evil lawmakers, or an unfair universe, they remained engaged in their work and spotted opportunities to fix long-standing problems with customer service and to tweak antiquated pricing structures.

In contrast, Maddi found that the struggling leaders were consumed by thoughts of “the good old days.” They spent their energy trying to figure out why their luck had suddenly turned sour. They tried to bounce back to a time and a place that no longer existed.

Although each of these six techniques requires different skills to pull off — and you’ll probably gravitate toward some more than others — there’s one thing that you must do if you want to be more successful at dealing with change: accept it.

Source: https://hbr.org/2016/09/how-to-get-better-at-dealing-with-change
And the truth shall set you free!  What a wonderful article!

If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place | Wayne Dyer

This is wonderful!  Hope you enjoy it!  Let me know what you think below!

Source: 

What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do | Michael Neill

Insecurity is a beast. Not really, of course – it just feels like it can wrap you around its finger like a professional wrestler and twist your insides into a pretzel. Like all other feelings, insecurity is made up of thought in the moment – in my case most commonly “what if?” scenarios as I drive myself crazy trying to solve problems I don’t yet (and may never) have.

As I began to see the inside-out nature of our personal reality more clearly, I noticed my insecure thinking ran the show inside my head less often. It became more of a “featured player”, coming in to do a dance number from time to time but no longer the star attraction. I relaxed inside to a level I’d rarely felt before.

When I tried to articulate what had shifted inside me, a phrase came to mind that still has great meaning to me:

"I know what to do when I don’t know what to do."

There is always a risk that in articulating an insight, people will gorge themselves on the fruit of that insight without ever allowing the seed it grew from to take root inside them. But by the same token, sometimes it’s only after tasting the fruit that one can truly recognize the value of the seed. So here’s what I know to do when I don’t know what to do. There’s not much to it, but I hope you’ll find it helpful…

1. Settle down

Were you ever told to “count to 10” before speaking when you get angry or upset?

Or to take a few deep breaths to gather yourself and regain your bearings before trying to solve a problem or resolve a conflict?

The reason these bits of advice are so common anywhere in the world is that they are rooted in a simple truth It’s the same truth behind why people have their best ideas in the shower or while out for a walk or on holiday, and why no matter how smart we are at our best, we all behave like idiots from time to time.

There is an ever-present responsive intelligence inside us – an impersonal property of what we might call “the universal Mind”. All human beings have ready access to this common sense, but it can become obscured when our thinking runs amok. The moment our personal thinking settles down, we can more easily see and hear the wisdom within.

Think of the mind like the ocean – continually changing on the surface, hidden currents underneath the surface, and absolute stillness underneath that. The wisdom that will guide us forward is already there underneath the waves of our personal thinking; the wisdom that will take us deeper is already there in the stillness and depths of our soul.

Which is why the most powerful way I know how to use the mind is this…

2. Listen

One of my mentors recently pointed out that with all the time I spend reading books, I have no time left to “read consciousness”. What I saw in that metaphoric observation was that at some level, I still value the articulation of insight in others more than the unfolding of wisdom inside myself.

Whenever I take the time to get quiet and just listen, it’s amazing what comes through. I don’t even need to ask a question – I just let my thoughts settle as best I can and new ideas and insights bubble up into the space within.

This receptive capacity of the mind tends to be undervalued in our culture, but throughout history, the greatest thinkers and leaders have been the ones willing to do what researcher Cal Newport calls “deep work” – escaping the constant noise of the world around them to reflect more deeply on the emergent wisdom within them.

When we are willing to put down what we already think we know and let something new come through, we begin to live insightfully. Instead of chewing on the cud of our own knowledge, we dine instead on the fresh green grass of our deeper wisdom. And what we are able to produce on a steady diet of healthy insight is really quite remarkable.

I’ll finish with a piece of advice from Syd Banks, the enlightened Scottish welder who I reference so often in these blogs. When asked for the “ultimate answer” to all of life’s questions, he responded with these words:

“What you’re searching for is a silent mind – a state of no-thought…What you do is you get a silent mind, then you go inside – you have a realization of this wisdom that lies within… then bingo, you get it. And when you get it, it enhances your life. If you just enjoy yourself, stop looking for any more, you silence your mind to a state of no-thought. Then divine thought comes in… and you have the answer.”

May you rest in peace in the silence of your mind and may the wisdom within you illuminate the world around you.

With all my love,


Source: https://www.michaelneill.org/cfts1050/