My Favorite Questions for Making Tough Decisions | Steve Pavlina

Sometime you’ll encounter tough decisions that can leave you wallowing in indecision, such as whether to change jobs or careers, end a relationship, move to a new city, or pursue a new lifestyle direction. There are many processes you can use to make intelligent decisions, but all of them have shortcomings when you’re dealing with imperfect information. Sometimes all it takes to gain sufficient clarity though is to ask the right questions. A good question can shift your perspective about your decision and make the wise path obvious.

When I face tough decisions, here are some of my favorite questions to ask:

Will this help me grow?

Since growth is one of my highest personal values, I favor decisions where I can expect to learn and growth. If I see little or no growth on a particular path, I’ll tend to lean against it.
This heuristic gives me a bias to embrace the new, as opposed to repeating something I’ve already done. It’s one reason I usually don’t repeat workshops. Even though it’s more work, I favor doing new workshops because a new workshop pushes me to learn and grow a lot more than repeating a past workshop does.

Asking this question helped me join Toastmasters in 2004, and I remained a member until 2010. I felt a bit anxious about getting involved with the group since I didn’t think it would be a comfortable experience to practice public speaking. But I went to my first meeting and joined a club because I figured that it would be a growth experience, and it certainly was. When the growth aspect faded and the experience became overly familiar, I quit Toastmasters and shifted my attention elsewhere.

There are many situations where fear and hesitation might hold me back, and then my mind wanders towards justification. I can’t because I’m too busy. The timing isn’t right. I’m not feeling my best. Yes… but will it be a growth experience? If a decision will help me grow, then I’m inclined to lean into it.

Sometimes my answer to this question takes the form of a grudging dammit, yes. Part of me doesn’t want it to be a yes, especially when the decision involves facing a fear, a lack of skill, or a lot of extra work, but it’s a good step to at least admit that if I move forward and say yes, I know it will be a growth experience.

Would my best self do this?

Asking this question gave me clarity when I was trying to decide whether or not to uncopyright all my blog posts back in 2010. I had created a tremendous body of intellectual property, and I owned it 100%. But I often wondered what would happen if I let go of that ownership and donated it to the public domain. It seemed like a huge leap, and there was no good way to predict the outcome.

When I asked if my best self would do this, the answer was clear. If uncopyrighting my work would help more people than keeping it copyrighted, my best self would pull the trigger and do it.

My best self is brave, generous, and creative. He could handle the consequences of giving so much away and letting the world run with it. He trusts that it would work out. He knows he can always create more. He doesn’t want to depend on ownership of intellectual property for his sense of security. For him it’s enough to feel secure in who he is. Even if things didn’t turn out so well, he could handle that too. He’s strong enough to deal with the consequences.
Asking this question removed enough doubt to make it so. Would my best self do this? Of course he would.

This still wasn’t an easy decision, but at least I knew that if I could do it, it would bring me further into alignment with my best self. If I held back, I’d be keeping myself out of alignment with him.

Do I want the memory?

Every decision ultimately becomes a memory, and the sum of your decisions will eventually become a string of memories. So which memories do you want?

Do you want the memories of maintaining your current social media habits for the next 10 years? (It’s extremely rare to find someone who can honestly answer yes to this.)

Do you want the memories of keeping your current job for another year? What about your current relationship situation?

Do you want the memories of taking that trip, or would you rather have the memories of not taking it?

This is a really powerful question, and some people have gained immediate clarity the first time they’ve asked it.

Of all the social media interactions and online commentary you’ve posted over the past decade, what do you remember? I remember very little of it. It’s all just a blur. My mind seems to value those memories so little that it didn’t store them in any meaningful detail.

This question helped me lean into lots of delightful travel experiences. Every year I travel to places that I’ve never been before, and one reason is that I love acquiring the memories that come from travel.

When you look back upon the past year, what do you remember? Do you like those memories? Could you have created better memories?

When I think about the past year, I remember eating lots of yummy meals at this small restaurant called Verde Vegan in Acapulco. I remember walking around the streets of London in the rain. I remember going to the top of a volcano, visiting a coffee plantation, and seeing several waterfalls in a rainforest in Costa Rica. I remember sipping espresso on a cobblestone sidewalk in Italy, walking around Villa Borghese park, staring up at the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and taking silly photos at the Mouth of Truth. I remember lots of fun times while spending 30 days at Disneyland. I remember seeing many plays at the Fringe Festival in Winnipeg and eating samosas with tamarind sauce. I remember sharing laughs and insights at last year’s workshops and going out to dinner with the attendees afterwards. And I remember doing all of these things with my girlfriend.

Most of my best memories are not about working at my desk. They come from having interesting experiences. Is it the same for you?

I’ve taken action on a lot of stretch ideas – and sometimes just plain silly ones – after asking myself if I wanted the memory. One of the silliest was last year’s decision to spend 30 days in a row going to Disneyland. That’s a lot of time to spend on such an experience, and I certainly could have used that time in other ways, but I realized if that I did it, I’d end up with some wonderful memories, plus the overall memory of taking action on a stretch experience.

I rarely regret taking action in a new direction.Usually I regret holding back. I think that’s true of most people. We tend to regret the opportunities we missed as opposed to those we pursued, even if we didn’t get the results we hoped for. We regret not trying even more than trying and failing. Failing is okay. Not trying just sucks.

You could ask yourself which path you’re more likely to regret, but regret is just one type of memory. So when you ask this memory question, it already covers potential regret.

How will this sculpt my character as a man?

I’m sharing this question the way I ask it, so feel free to modify it to fit your gender, or use a gender-neutral substitute like, How will this sculpt my character as a human being?

This was an especially powerful question to ask when I was in my 20s, and I was thinking about what kind of man I wanted to become. This question stemmed from a realization I had while sitting in jail for a few days when I was 19 years old. I saw myself becoming someone much darker than I wanted to be, and that realization woke me up. I realized that in order to change the man I was becoming, I had to start making different decisions.

The decisions you make ultimately define your character and personality. Making a decision is like chiseling out the sculpture of who you’re becoming. Most decisions only chisel out small details. Some decisions define significant aspects of the final piece. The decisions I made while sitting in jail were some of my life’s biggest.

If you’d visited my website between 2004 and 2008, you would have seen a lot of ads. At the peak I was earning $12-13K per month in passive income from having advertising on the site. In late 2008 though, I removed all the ads, which immediately shut off that income.
One reason I made this choice is that I saw it as a character decision. I didn’t feel congruent with distracting my readers with third-party advertising when they came to my website to read about personal growth. I faced a choice, and each option would sculpt my character differently.

The first option was to continue enjoying the easy passive income from advertising for many more years. By today it would probably have been about a million dollars extra if I’d kept having advertising. This would also mean many years of sculpting myself into a man who accepts a misalignment with his values in order to make money, which would only make it more likely that I’d continue making similar decisions down the road.

The second option was to remove the ads and look for more aligned ways to earn income. This would mean pursuing a path of greater congruence, even if it might be less profitable. It would also be a harder path to take because the advertising income was very easy to maintain. This path would definitely be more work.

I chose the second path because I believed it would sculpt my character in a more positive direction. It would be more difficult in the short term, but I liked the idea of shedding misaligned income sources in order to do the harder work of creating aligned sources. The year after I made this decision, I created and delivered my first three-day workshop. Fast forward to today, and now I’ve done 16 of them. While the workshops weren’t as lucrative as 
I expect the ads would have been, they’ve paid off in many other ways that I value much more than money. For instance, I met my girlfriend Rachelle at that first workshop, and a key strength of our relationship has been our values alignment, such as the fact that we’re both long-term vegans. And we love traveling and having fun lifestyle adventures together as well.

If you accept a misalignment in your life, you’ll attract more of the same. If you go for congruence, you’ll also attract more of the same. So think carefully about how each decision will sculpt your character.

I’m glad that I made the decision to remove those ads in 2008. Getting that incongruence out of the way helped me feel much closer and more connected with my readers. Since then I have met – and hugged – hundreds of them in person. The ads didn’t feel heart-aligned, so by getting those out of the way, I removed a barrier that might have otherwise weakened this relationship.

I could name many more instances where this character question has helped me make tricky decisions. This question nudges me to face more fears, to pursue new experiences, and to delve deeper into personal growth explorations than I otherwise would. I don’t always get it right, but I get it right more often when I ask this question.

Could I reverse or undo this decision?

Last week I decided to get a new home office chair to replace my really old beat up one. As I began browsing online, I thought that maybe I should get a really nice one this time instead of just another cheap sub-$100 chair from Office Depot, especially since one of my health goals for this year is to work on improving my posture. After doing some research, I narrowed the decision down to two choices: the Herman Miller Embody and the Steelcase Gesture. I’ve never owned a chair that had a name before.

Both chairs costs more than $1000. Both have radically different designs. I couldn’t find any stores in Vegas that actually carry them, so I couldn’t try them out first. Online reviews were helpful, but I could find really detailed, in-depth reviews that ranked either chair above the other. And wherever one chair got lots of four- and five-star reviews, I could always find other people rating it one and two stars. It seemed to come down to a matter of personal preference.

Instead of wallowing in indecision or not getting a chair at all, I went with the one I expected to like best – the Steelcase Gesture – even though I had to order it sight unseen and hope for the best when it arrives. What helped was knowing that the decision is reversible. If I don’t like it, I can pack it back up and return it. Or worst case I can always sell it. I might waste some time and money if I made a bad decision, but the long-term consequence is minimal, and the damage is largely reversible.

Some decisions are permanent, and you can’t simply undo them. If you quit your job or leave your relationship, you may not be able to go back if you later change your mind. But for many decisions, there’s a built-in undo. You can often return items you purchased. You can move back to your old city. You can buy back similar possessions to replace those you gave away. You can switch back to your old diet and exercise routines.

If a decision is reversible and/or the negative consequences of a mistake are low, then I’ll tend to lean towards the new experience. At the very least, I might learn something from it.

Can I test this decision?

If you can’t undo a decision, maybe you can test it somehow. Could you dip your toes into each path to gain more clarity about the options? Could you collect some real world experience before you have to commit?

This mindset was especially helpful in 2009 when trying to figure out whether Erin and I should stay together. By entering a polyamorous phase for several months, it was possible to test the waters by exploring other connections without ending the marriage. That provided tremendous clarity that the grass would indeed be greener on the other side. It still wasn’t an easy decision, but it became easier by testing.

Some long-term couples go through a trial separation first in order to test what their lives might be like if they were to separate and divorce. A good book for structuring such an arrangement is Should I Stay or Go? : How Controlled Separation Can Save Your Marriage. That book takes a pretty formal approach, which Erin and I didn’t really follow, but the general idea of testing the waters first is certainly helpful in these types of situations.

Testing a decision can help you tip one way or the other, so you don’t remain endlessly stuck in ambivalence, where you’re constantly waffling about which direction to go.

* * *

Try asking some or all of these questions the next time you face a tricky decision. I think you’ll find them useful tools for increasing clarity and making better choices. When I’ve shared some of these questions with other people, their number one favorite is usually the memory one, so that may be a good one to start with.

Please let me know what you think below.

Source 

Controlling Your Own Schedule | Steve Pavlina

Sometimes people use their job as their blanket excuse for not being in control of their schedule. “Oh… I can’t because I have a job,” is the main reason people give for not being able to do 30-day trials, experience extended travel, and do immersive deep dives.

However, during periods without a job, these same people often switch to a different excuse. Oh… I can’t because I’m unemployed right now.

Self-employed people do this too. Oh… I can’t because I have to work.

Work will come and go. Your finances may fluctuate over time. But no matter what, time is passing. You have the same number of days this month that anyone else has. You’re free to decide how you’ll use these days. If you want to spend this time on work, you can do that. If you want to spend the time on other growth and lifestyle activities, you can do that too.

You Have More Control Than You Think

Many people have a hard time accepting the responsibility of being in control, so they yield this control to someone else. Unless you’re being forcibly enslaved, giving someone else control of your schedule is only a temporary assignment. The truth is that you’re still in control all along because you can make a different decision whenever you desire.

If you give control of your schedule to a boss, a company, a client, a spouse, or anyone else, that’s a temporary choice. These people don’t actually have control over your time without your consent. You can always change your mind and start saying “No, thanks” to their requests.

Not having control over your schedule can be stressful. But the lack of control is an illusion. You chose to put yourself in that situation, and you didn’t have to. You could have made different decisions, and you still can. If you don’t like the stress, you can take back control and make different decisions.

I’m not suggesting that you can control other people’s reactions, and fortunately you don’t need to. I’m just suggesting you can start using your time differently and thereby get different results.

Shortly after I started my first business developing computer games, I made the mistake of giving control over my schedule to other people, mostly publishers I worked with. That created a lot of stress. Several years later when I realized I didn’t have to do that, I stopped and reclaimed control over my schedule. The stress went way down, and I enjoyed my life and my work so much more.

Even when I was deep in debt, I realized I didn’t have to waste my time answering creditors’ phone calls or reading their computer generated letters. During a time when it seemed entirely unreasonable to control my own schedule, I took back control and let everyone else lay the consequences upon me. I worked on the projects that appealed to me. I exercised a lot. I put more energy into my overall enjoyment of life. I let the most demanding people spin their wheels while I focused on my own goals.

Is this completely selfish? I don’t think so, especially since contribution was a big part of my goals. By taking back control, I learned to make better decisions than others had been making on my behalf.

The people I know who enjoy the greatest lifestyle freedom (and usually the greatest all-around happiness) wield a lot of control over their schedules. They decide what they want to do and when they’ll do it. They don’t always get it right, but they figure out what works for them through trial and error. They like seeing each year as a canvas upon which they consciously paint the unfolding story of their lives.

We all have this freedom. We just have to step up and claim it, which means we have to start consciously rejecting unreasonable claims to our time.

Even if someone else seems to control some of your schedule, this is happening with your consent. You didn’t have to consent to this, and you still don’t. No one else actually controls how you spend your time. People can offer you tasks to do, and you can accept or decline those at will. Either way there are consequences.

You control your schedule. You can pretend that you don’t, but yielding control to someone else is only a mind-game you play with yourself.

The Real Consequences

What are the consequences of not following orders? You may get chastised. You may get fired or rejected. What keeps you in line is the fear and resistance regarding those consequences. The real consequences are usually no big deal though.

The consequences that many people fear are the same consequences that other people accept and enjoy as their daily reality. I get chastised now and then. And I’ve lived without a job for 24 years so far. These aren’t scary consequences to be avoided. This is just normal, everyday life.

Look at the flip side. Have you thought about the consequences of obedience and passivity? What are the consequences of following too many orders? You may not be able to travel much. You may not have time to explore a rich and rewarding social life with quality friends. You may not be able to consciously work on your personal growth. You may not have time to set and achieve your own goals. You may miss out on life itself.

There are consequences on both sides. The question I like to ask is this: Which path will yield the most growth in the long run?

The main reason I don’t give someone else control over my schedule is that I trust that I’ll make smarter, more growth-oriented decisions than they will. I don’t have to make brilliant decisions every day, and I wouldn’t find that realistic anyway. I just have to outperform a would-be boss, which isn’t difficult.

The Growth Challenge of Freedom

Having lots of control over your schedule is a major growth challenge unto itself. What will you do with all that time? There are so many possibilities to consider! How can you even choose from such an endless sea of possibilities?

People often let someone else make these choices for them because they don’t understand the real challenge. The challenge is simply to make a better use of your time than someone else would choose for you.

You can hire someone to control your time for you, but they’ll generally take a significant cut of the value of your labor for the privilege (typically 60-70%). Hiring a manager (i.e. a boss) is expensive, so if you go this route, be sure to hire a quality manager who will listen to your feedback and help you grow and improve over time. Having a mentor boss for a while can be a valuable part of your journey.

When you’re in control of your own schedule, your personal weaknesses are fully exposed. If you aren’t very focused or disciplined, you’ll soon find yourself drifting and flailing. Then you have a growth challenge. How can you make reasonably intelligent decisions and focus and discipline your mind to get things done? Can you do this on your own?

These are tough challenges to be sure. That’s why the self-determination route appeals to me so much. These challenges really push me to grow. I find myself dropped into a sea of possibilities, and I must learn to swim.

This challenge is there for all of us. Just because we pretend it isn’t there doesn’t make it recede. You can give someone else control over your schedule, but the personal challenge remains intact. The invitation to greater growth is always present. You can embrace this challenge by consciously wielding control over your own schedule, acknowledging that you can never truly assign this responsibility to someone else. Or you can go dark and pretend you aren’t in control.

Oh… I can’t because I have a job, isn’t a valid excuse for not tackling other growth challenges. You can tackle whatever challenges appeal to you, so don’t pretend to be helpless and out of control. Just say, “I choose not to tackle these growth challenges because I’m currently exploring and enjoying other growth challenges right now.” Even when you’re choosing to follow orders for a while, stay conscious by acknowledging that you’re always in control over your decisions and your schedule.

Great food for thought?  Let me know what you think below.  


Source 

Human Change Management | Gilda Bonanno

Keynote speaker Gilda Bonanno describes how to successfully manage change so you can continue to learn and grow www.gildabonanno.com.  Understanding the change process can significantly improve your ability to get through it to the new beginning in your life.  
"Am I living with power and passion?"  
"Yes I am, because today is the day I choose to live a more productive life.  Today is the day I make conscious choices.   Today is the day I prioritise based on what I truly believe is important in my life.   Today is the day I choose to live a more inspired life.   Today is the day I realise (that) this is not a dress rehearsal: this is my real life!" 
"Time is the coin of your life.  Only you can determine how it will be spent."  Carl Sandberg
How will you spend the remainder of your 28,000 days.
Source 

25 Books for Success | Erin Casey

Out of hundreds, the editors of SUCCESS have narrowed our list to 25 must-read books for achievers. The task wasn't easy, although our criteria were simple. These are books we've read, liked and that made a difference in our lives. We chose books that take a comprehensive approach to money, life and personal development because we know that one-dimensional success really isn't success at all.

You might wonder why your favorite book didn't make the list. Well, we could've filled the magazine with dozens more books. Our top 25 are by no stretch of the imagination the only books you should read. To the contrary, we know reading about and applying techniques and success strategies are the best ways to discover and stay focused on your life's journey.

We hope our list opens your eyes to something new, inspires you to pick up that volume you've always meant to read or to re-read a favorite classic. If you have suggestions on what we didn't include, we want to hear from you.

We encourage you to find a book that interests you and carve out a few minutes every day to read at least a few pages. You'll be amazed at the difference it will make in your journey toward success!

1. How To Win Friends and Influence People

First published in 1937, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie was an overnight success with staying power. Today, this book is regarded as one of the all-time best for its lessons on dealing with people.

The chapter titles seem, at first, a little manipulative: "Six ways to make people like you," "12 ways to win people to your way of thinking." But the reality of Carnegie's teachings is that none will work if the intent is manipulation. The word "genuine" appears repeatedly throughout the book. Only with authenticity and honesty will Carnegie's methods work consistently.

How to Win Friends and Influence People is packed with anecdotes from historical leaders and lessons learned or taught by some of history's greatest businessmen, making the read as interesting as it is enlightening. And the methods--calling a person by his or her name or looking at the situation from the other's point of view--work in business and in personal life with family and friends.

Carnegie's book is a classic. Though he credits many people for inspiring his ideas, his methods are the foundation for many of today's personal-development and business-management books.

2. The Richest Man in Babylon

Too often, life doesn't turn out as expected. And money, or the lack of money, plays a large role in people's ability to handle life's ups and downs. Perhaps that's why, in the 1920s, banks and insurance companies decided to distribute short parables written to educate people on important financial principles. The Richest Man in Babylon by George S. Clason began in 1926 as a series of pamphlets, the most famous ones later compiled into one of the best-loved money guides of all time.

The book begins with two men realizing that, while they lived a meager existence, one of their childhood friends had become known as the wealthiest man in Babylon. Despite growing up in similar circumstances, their friend seemed to have created a life of gold while they barely scratched out a living.

The situation is all too familiar even today. And like the men who'd come to the realization that they'd failed to think beyond the day at hand, readers have the opportunity to sit at the feet of the richest man in Babylon and learn how to build wealth. They learn how to plan for the future, make wise investments and how to view money as a tool rather than a measure of success.

With time-tested principles and an engaging format, The Richest Man in Babylon is an excellent introduction to finance, and a classic.

3. Think and Grow Rich

Napoleon Hill, inspired by business legend Andrew Carnegie, spent 20 years of his life studying the lives of some of history's most successful people. The culmination of his research was the in-depth series, The Laws of Success. In 1937, Hill published another book, Think and Grow Rich, founded on the same philosophies of success. This book condensed the wealth of knowledge he's accumulated into 13 principles for successful living.

Shorter and perhaps easier to get through than its multivolume predecessor, Think and Grow Rich is as applicable today as it was when it was first released. The title's principles are founded on Hill's belief in the power of the mind, and his famous quotes, such as, "Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve," have changed the way millions of people view their lives. When read in its entirety and its principles put into action, Think and Grow Rich not only helps people change their views on life, but also the way they behave and, ultimately, their reality.

More than 30 million copies of Think and Grow Rich have been bought by business students, entrepreneurs and goal-setters around the world. When it was re-released in 2004, it rocketed once again to the top, holding a place on BusinessWeek's Best Seller list for paperback business books for more than 20 months.

Think and Grow Rich is a timeless classic that should be read by everyone interested in improving their lives and reaching their goals.

4. The 9 Steps to Financial Freedom: Practical and Spiritual Steps So You Can Stop Worrying

Suze Orman (Crown, 1997) As a financial expert, Suze Orman offers advice on the nuts and bolts of managing money. But whether you're watching her on television or reading her advice in O, The Oprah Magazine, or in one of her best-selling books, such as 9 Steps to Financial Freedom, her message is clear: Wealth is an attitude and money isn't the key to acquiring true financial freedom.

In this acclaimed book, Orman challenges readers to face their financial fears and acknowledge the importance of planning for the future. With a three-pronged approach, Orman tackles the mental, physical and spiritual issues that keep people from reaching financial freedom. Also available in audio format, 9 Steps to Financial Freedom encourages personal growth while offering the education necessary to begin the process of building a rich life.

Again, it's the total approach to financial success that sets this and the other financial books on this list apart. Acquiring wealth isn't as simple as piling up the green stuff. Your beliefs about money, yourself and the world around you have as much to do with wealth as do the riches you acquire.

5. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

While Stephen Covey wasn't the first to write a book on becoming a better, more effective person, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People marked the beginning of a revitalized interest in personal development. With a 15th anniversary edition released in 2004 and more than 15 million copies sold, this book has helped millions change their perspective and their lives.

Unlike many authors of books in this genre, Covey doesn't promise a simple, quick fix for creating a better life. In fact, mastering the seven habits he outlines could take a lifetime. But as with many personal-development efforts, it's what you learn as you work toward becoming a truly effective person that matters.

The habits are divided into three sections: Private Victory, Public Victory and Renewal. Private Victory focuses on the individual's view of himself. The first three habits are: becoming proactive, beginning with the end in mind, and putting first things first. These habits will challenge you to take responsibility for your thoughts, beliefs and actions. The Public Victory section focuses on creating meaningful, mutually beneficial relationships. And because being effective requires energy and focus, the seventh habit, "Sharpening the Saw," encourages you to engage in activities that promote mental and physical renewal.

Covey says that when our behavior contradicts our beliefs or when our relationships consistently fail, any successes we achieve feel hollow. This book takes a total approach to success and encourages growth and maturity beginning with self, which leads to stronger relationships and greater success at home and at work.

6. Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives

Dan Millman (HJ Kramer, 2006) The first of Dan Millman's writings, this book is an inspirational story based largely on his college years. The book delves into the notion that a person can be accomplished and successful without feeling alive or genuinely happy.

Millman learns "the way of the peaceful warrior" from a mysterious old man he names Socrates. His mentor leads him through a journey of self-discovery. The lessons the young man endures and later accepts are applicable for anyone searching for greater meaning in life.

7. The Law of Success In Sixteen Lessons by Napoleon Hill

Napoleon Hill (Combined Registry Co., 1966) Twenty-six years of research, including interviews with more than 500 self-made millionaires, laid the foundation for this massive collection. After studying the methods and accomplishments of masterminds such as Thomas Edison, John D. Rockefeller, Henry Ford, Andrew Carnegie, Theodore Roosevelt and Alexander Graham Bell, Napoleon Hill compiled what he learned, offering it to the world as the Laws of Success.

More than theories for a book, Hill applied the precepts to his life and discovered immeasurable success. The book's size might seem intimidating, but Hill wrote so it could be taught to high school students, keeping the text rich but easy to understand. This personal-development guru paves the road to success with timeless wisdom.

8. Acres of Diamonds: All Good Things Are Possible, Right Where You Are, and Now!

Russell H. Conwell (Filiquarian, 2007) Opportunities for success, wealth and happiness often lie under foot and yet go unnoticed. This little book, originally a speech by Russell Conwell, serves as a reminder not to overlook the abundance right on our doorstep.

This timeless work is freely available online, in both written and audio formats, and addresses the myth that fame and fortune are waiting somewhere "out there." He also dispels the notion that men and women of integrity shouldn't desire money or wealth. "Money is power, and you ought to be reasonably ambitious to have it. You ought because you can do more good with it than you could without it," Conwell said. And to that end, he advises readers to begin searching for the diamonds in their lives… at home.

9. As a Man Thinketh

James Allen (Filiquarian, 2007) Published in 1902, "This little volume" as James Allen refers to it, has been a source of inspiration for millions and has influenced the work of many respected personal-development leaders. And with statements such as, "The soul attracts that which it secretly harbors, that which it loves, and also that which it fears," Allen paved the way for many contemporary philosophers.

At its core is the belief that "as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." Allen uses eloquent period language to bring readers to the realization that thoughts and character are inseparably intertwined. Equally as important is the lesson of personal responsibility taking precedence over thoughts and actions. He prescribes focused time to reflect and discover yourself and your dreams, and to put forth energy and time to make those dreams reality. This book, now in the public domain and freely accessible on the Internet, should be in every achiever's library.

10. Maximum Achievement: Strategies and Skills That Will Unlock Your Hidden Powers to Succeed

Brian Tracy (Simon & Schuster, 1995) As suggested by this book's subtitle, "Strategies and skills that will unlock your hidden powers to succeed," it's likely you already possess what's required to create success in your life. Those who apply these strategies provided by Brian Tracy can make changes that quickly produce results.

Learn how to create success that encompasses every area of life-health, personal and professional happiness, relationships and wealth. Whether you're already on the road to success or just getting started on your success journey, the principles outlined in the book will help you realize your true potential. Build the life you want and attain the peace of mind that comes with the knowledge that you control your destiny.

11. The Seasons of Life by Jim Rohn 

Jim Rohn & Ronald Reynolds (Jim Rohn International, 1981) In The Seasons of Life, Jim Rohn and Ronald Reynolds draw parallels between life and the changing seasons. When you learn that change is the only guarantee, you can make the most of each season as it comes into your life.

It's possible to learn and grow from every experience. The authors help readers understand that every season is necessary and valuable-even winter, when life seems harsh and your actions unfruitful.

12. See You at the Top

Zig Ziglar (Pelican Publishing Company, 2000) There's room for you at the top! Zig Ziglar's message has inspired millions to change their lives by helping them do, be and have more than they dared dream possible.

Ziglar offers a nuts-and-bolts approach to developing the self-image, attitudes and habits that make people successful. Learn how to set and achieve goals, how to create momentum that propels you forward in life and why being focused on others is a critical aspect of success. This step-by-step guide will help you excel in every area of life.

13. The Magic of Thinking Big

David J. Schwartz (Pocket Books, 1995) Thinking big separates the achievers from the average. In this best-selling classic, David Schwartz suggests that it's not necessarily intelligence or work ethic that move people up the ladder of success, but the personal choice people make to believe that something bigger and better is possible.

Make time to reflect on your life's goals and expand them. Once you have a clear picture of what you want, focus your energy on achieving that goal. Keep your eyes fixed on your goal and do not allow the small thinking of the world around you to cloud your vision. Schwartz offers practical advice for putting the magic of thinking big to work in your life.

14. The Power of Positive Thinking

Norman Vincent Peale (Fireside, 2007) The belief that positive thoughts lead to a positive reality isn't a new phenomenon. Decades before The Secret, Norman Vincent Peale wrote The Power of Positive Thinking. The book teaches readers that focused, intentional and unyielding belief is required before they can achieve the lives they desire.

The philosophies from this best-selling book have helped millions reach their personal, financial, spiritual and relationship goals. Learn to replace negative thoughts with positive beliefs and to break the worry habit by cultivating a character that isn't swayed by circumstances.

15. Awaken the Giant Within : How to Take Immediate Control of Your Mental, Emotional, Physical and Financial Destiny!

Anthony Robbins (Free Press, 1992) Within each person is a sleeping giant of greatness. With this book, motivational coach Anthony Robbins seeks to help you "take immediate control of mental, emotional, physical and financial destiny."

Not one to do things in a small way, Robbins found huge success, lost it all and then, using the techniques outlined in this book, took control of his life and his success. This personal-development classic delves into the specifics of goal-setting, achieving success in relationships, talking to yourself and discovering your true potential.

16. Developing the Leader Within You

John C. Maxwell (Thomas Nelson, 2005) Developing the Leader Within You makes the theories of leadership personal. For those struggling to take the next step in their careers or who doubt their leadership abilities, the book offers practical methods for developing leadership skills.

Recognizing that some people have innate leadership-personality traits, the book provides direction
for becoming more effective. But John Maxwell's book debunks the myth that only an exclusive few are born to be leaders. Instead, he suggests that everyone benefits from learning self-discipline, seeking mentors and adding to their skills through training.

Maxwell defines leadership as influence and points out that a management title isn't a prerequisite. Regardless of your career, position or personality, learn how to become an effective leader.

17. The One Minute Manager

Kenneth Blanchard (HarperCollins Business, 2000) Apply the principals taught in The One Minute Manager and watch your team's productivity and job satisfaction grow. This allegorical tale pulls together the wisdom gained through experience, allowing readers to prosper without making their predecessors' mistakes.

The One Minute management style allows leaders to be efficient and effective with their time. The short chapters in this easy read focus on interaction between managers and their teams. By setting goals that encourage, redirecting, reprimanding and praising appropriately, leaders can get more from their teams while earning their respect.

18. Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap...And Others Don't

Jim Collins (Collins, 2001) If good is the enemy of great, can good companies become great? And if so, how is that transition made with lasting effect? These are some of the questions central to the research that led to the publication of Good to Great.

Five years of investigation uncovered the characteristics that made uncommonly great companies outshine their competition and earn significantly higher profits. Comparing the differentiating traits of good companies and their great counterparts, Jim Collins and his research team learned that, among other things, leaders who willingly work with their heads and hearts, rather than their egos, are required to take a company from good to great. Such leaders create the foundation for the culture and sustainable results that propel an organization to excellence.

19. The Automatic Millionaire: A Powerful One-Step Plan to Live and Finish Rich

David Bach (Broadway, 2003) Who wouldn't want to become a millionaire automatically? The truths related in this book, as in Bach's Finish Rich series, are that nothing great is accomplished without forethought. But with a little planning and by putting many aspects of your finances on autopilot, you can be on the road to wealth.

The automatic aspect plan allows readers to save time while saving money. And though many of the principles aren't new, Bach's easy-to-understand approach helps the reader understand them in a new way. Some of the highlights include principles such as paying yourself first, and advice about why and how to save for retirement-even if you're hard-pressed to make ends meet now. Bach also provides advice for accomplishing short-term savings goals and explains that giving is an important part of wealth.

20. Rich Dad Poor Dad

Robert T. Kiyosaki (Time Warner Paperbacks, 2002) The paradigm shift related to work, employment and entrepreneurship has been a long time coming. In one of his most-read books, Rich Dad Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki reveals the value of taking control of your financial destiny through entrepreneurship and investing.

In Rich Dad Poor Dad, Kiyosaki contrasts the differences between what the rich and the poor or middle classes teach their children. As a young man, Kiyosaki was taught by his "poor dad" to follow the path of least resistance: Get an education, get a job and work hard. His "rich dad," his friend's dad, mentored him to do the opposite. The book acknowledges education is important but it isn't always best received in a formal learning environment. Lessons include the value of self-employment, how to be self-employed without limiting yourself to the constraints of an employee, and how to create and take advantage of residual-income opportunities. Instead of working hard for money, use the principles in this book to make money work for you.

21. The Greatest Salesman in the World

Og Mandino (Frederick Fell Publishers, 2001) Ten ancient scrolls hold the key to wealth and happiness in this classic parable. A young camel boy wishing to improve his station in life takes his master's words to heart: "No other trade or profession has more opportunity for one to rise from poverty to great wealth than that of a salesman." Desiring success and wealth, the young man sets out to become the greatest salesman in the world.

This pocket-sized book can be read easily in an hour, but it's packed with wisdom for those pursuing a career in sales. Far more than a how-to book on closing the sale, the story encourages the reader to contribute to society and to grow in peace of mind and in heart. Those who apply the principles in the scrolls will learn how to overcome the challenges of sales, how to persist through trials and, ultimately, how to succeed.

22. The Sales Bible: The Ultimate Sales Resource: Including The 10.5 Commandments of Sales Success

Jeffrey Gitomer (Wiley, 2003) Jeffrey Gitomer has an extremely low tolerance for lamenting salespeople and that comes through in the bold and fast-paced tone of his books. The Sales Bible puts more than 100 sales facts, tips and solutions at your disposal to help you "make sales while others are whining!"

This book magnifies the details of every aspect of sales. Learn the basics and understand how recent changes in selling affect you and your pitch. Discover the keys to setting yourself apart from the competition and finding your prospect's button. The table of contents is designed to help you quickly identify specific topics. Or just start reading from cover to cover for an excellent education from someone who knows the profession from the inside out.

23. Who Moved My Cheese?: An A-Mazing Way to Deal with Change in Your Work and in Your Life

Dr. Spencer Johnson (Vermilion, 2002) For many people, change can be challenging. It can cause fear, anger and the feeling of being out of control. This popular parable examines change and what happens to those who choose not to embrace it.

"If you do not change, you can become extinct," is one of the many truisms the characters learn in Who Moved My Cheese? What's holding you back? Are you taking note of small changes that could lead to more significant changes in the future? In the maze of life, it's possible to successfully deal with change if and when you clear your mind of expectations and understand that while your comfort zone may be cozy, it's not necessarily the safest place to live.

24. Chicken Soup for the Soul Series

Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen, with other contributors (Health Communications Inc., 1993-2008) Need inspiration? The phenomenal success of Chicken Soup for the Soul offers inspiration on many levels. From the tenacity it took to get the first Chicken Soup for the Soul published (Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen were rejected by 140 publishers and their book agent before finding a publisher willing to take a chance on their idea) to the thousands of touching and thought-provoking stories, these books will warm your heart and may help you view life from a new perspective.

The original Chicken Soup for the Soul went to the top of the best-seller list in less than a year. Today, one or more of the Chicken Soup books is consistently listed on the New York Times and other major best-sellers lists.

As an entrepreneur, parent or business leader, staying at the top or your game requires regular jolts of passion and healthy doses of laughter. Find both by picking up a copy on a topic that interests you. With more than 170 titles in the series, you're sure to find one that inspires you.

25. Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude

Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone (Pocket Books, 1991) Success through a Positive Mental Attitude was first published in 1960, written by two of history's greatest personal-development leaders, Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone. For almost half a century, this book has been the launching point for those who want to change the direction of their lives.

Hill and Stone recognize that each person has their own definition of success. But whether your desire is to build great wealth, own profitable organizations or be a world-renowned artist, the authors point out, "You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by trying. Success is achieved and maintained by those who keep trying with a [positive mental attitude]."

This book addresses all areas of life. From getting the job you want to building better relationships with those around you to living healthier longer (Stone lived to be 100 years old!), this book takes an inclusive approach to success, beginning with your state of mind.

Why a must-read? When you're looking for advice on how to create a successful and rewarding life, why not get the answers from those who have "been there, done that?" These thought leaders and business experts used the principles of positive mental attitude and experienced a lifetime of rewards.

Have you read some or all of these books?  What do you think?  Which one will you read next and why? Please let me know below.

Source

4 Tips for Setting Powerful Goals | Jim Rohn

We all have two choices: We can make a living or we can design a life. Here’s how to do the latter.

The most important benefit of setting goals isn’t achieving your goal; it’s what you do and the person you become in order to achieve your goal that’s the real benefit.

Goal setting is powerful because it provides focus. It shapes our dreams. It gives us the ability to hone in on the exact actions we need to perform to achieve everything we desire in life. Goals are great because they cause us to stretch and grow in ways that we never have before. In order to reach our goals, we must become better.

Life is designed in such a way that we look long-term and live short-term. We dream for the future and live in the present. Unfortunately, the present can produce many difficult obstacles. But setting goals provides long-term vision in our lives. We all need powerful, long-range goals to help us get past those short-term obstacles. Fortunately, the more powerful our goals are, the more we’ll be able to act on and guarantee that they will actually come to pass.

What are the key aspects to learn and remember when studying and writing our goals? Here’s a closer look at goal setting and how you can make it forceful and practical:

1. Evaluate and reflect.

The only way we can reasonably decide what we want in the future and how we’ll get there is to know where we are right now and what our current level of satisfaction is. So first, take some time to think through and write down your current situation; then ask this question on each key point: Is that OK?

The purpose of evaluation is twofold. First, it gives you an objective way to look at your accomplishments and your pursuit of the vision you have for life. Secondly, it shows you where you are so you can determine where you need to go. Evaluation gives you a baseline to work from.

Take a couple of hours this week to evaluate and reflect. See where you are and write it down so that as the months progress and you continue a regular time of evaluation and reflection, you will see just how much ground you’re gaining—and that will be exciting!

2. Define your dreams and goals.

One of the amazing things we have been given as humans is the unquenchable desire to have dreams of a better life and the ability to establish and set goals to live out those dreams. We can look deep within our hearts and dream of a better situation for ourselves and our families. 

We can dream of better financial, emotional, spiritual or physical lives. We have also been given the ability to not only dream, but pursue those dreams—and not just pursue them, but the cognitive ability to lay out a plan and strategies to achieve those dreams. Powerful!

What are your dreams and goals? This isn’t what you already have or what you have done, but what you want. Have you ever really sat down and thought through your life values and decided what you really want? Have you ever taken the time to truly reflect, to listen quietly to your heart, to see what dreams live within you? Your dreams are there. Everyone has them. They may live right on the surface, or they may be buried deep from years of others telling you they were foolish, but they are there.

Take time to be quiet. This is something that we don’t do enough of in this busy world of ours. We rush, rush, rush, and we’re constantly listening to noise all around us. The human heart was meant for times of quiet—to peer deep within. It is when we do this that our hearts are set free to soar and take flight on the wings of our own dreams. Schedule some quiet “dream time” this week. No other people. No cellphone. No computer. Just you, a pad, a pen and your thoughts.

Think about what really thrills you. When you are quiet, think about those things that really get your blood moving. What would you love to do, either for fun or for a living? What would you love to accomplish? What would you try if you were guaranteed to succeed? What big thoughts move your heart into a state of excitement and joy? When you answer these questions you will feel great and you will be in the “dream zone.” It is only when we get to this point that we experience what our dreams are.

Write down all of your dreams as you have them. Don’t think of any as too outlandish or foolish—remember—you’re dreaming! Let the thoughts fly and take careful record.
Now, prioritize those dreams. Which are most important? Which are most feasible? Which would you love to do the most? Put them in the order in which you will actually try to attain them. Remember, we are always moving toward action—not just dreaming.

3. Make your goals S.M.A.R.T.

The acronym S.M.A.R.T. means Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time-sensitive.

Specific:

Goals are no place to waffle. They are no place to be vague. Ambiguous goals produce ambiguous results. Incomplete goals produce incomplete futures.

Measurable:

Always set goals that are measurable. I would say “specifically measurable” to take into account our principle of being specific.

Attainable:

One of the detrimental things that many people do—with good intentions—is setting goals that are so high that they are unattainable.

Realistic:

The root word of realistic is “real.” A goal has to be something that we can reasonably make “real” or a “reality” in our lives. There are some goals that are simply not realistic. You have to be able to say, even if it is a tremendously stretching goal, that yes, indeed, it is entirely realistic—that you could make it. You may even have to say that it will take x, y and z to do it, but if those happen, then it can be done. This is in no way to say it shouldn’t be a big goal, but it must be realistic.

Time:

Every goal should have a timeframe attached to it. One of the powerful aspects of a great goal is that it has an end—a time in which you are shooting to accomplish it. As time goes by, you work on it because you don’t want to get behind, and you work diligently because you want to meet the deadline. You may even have to break down a big goal into different parts of measurement and timeframes—that is OK. Set smaller goals and work them out in their own time. A S.M.A.R.T. goal has a timeline.

4. Have accountability.

When someone knows what your goals are, they hold you accountable by asking you to “give an account” of where you are in the process of achieving that goal. Accountability puts some teeth into the process. If a goal is set and only one person knows it, does it really have any power? Many times, no. A goal isn’t as powerful if you don’t have one or more people who can hold you accountable to it.

Source